Saturday, 6 August 2011

Mr Right or Mr. Oh So Wrong

Our mission in life is to make ourselves attractive to the opposite sex. Make up, hair, designer clothes (well pennys if your bank balance is as sick as mine) and dare I mention the time it takes to transform into those Saturday night goddesses. But what happens the next day when we wake up with that empty feeling in our gut and kissing randomer's just doesn't cut it anymore? The facade is crumbling. Slowly but surely we realize that the morning after the night before we are infinitely alone and no amount of shots or sleezy, nightclub snogging is going to alter it! What do we do now? Do we continue to wander the planet searching for Mr Right only to stumble upon Mr Wrong over and over again and think "ah sure he'll do for the moment?". Why are we wasting our precious and limited time fumbling around this dating minefield where we just miss the next explosion unscathed by a hairs breath! Our confidence that we'll find Mr. Big shrinks with every dating disaster we so expertly endure. Many turn to online match making sites in the hope that Mr. Right will just happen to peer across the screen at them with a bank balance as big as his erm wallet... Most times they end up with some freak who continues to ask them to rub the lotion into their skin until they run for the hills thanking god they weren't crimelines next hot topic! Oh the disappointment that is the dating world. Those heart melting, tear jerking, but vomit enducing romantic comedies glamorize it leadig us into pure dating depression when we discover we've been lied to! Our potential handsome prince bares a striking resemblance to Hannibal Lecter. It seems that we must fall victim to some bizarre accident where Mr. Right will just happen across our path after we have suffered some rare form of amnesia. Hopefully after 20 first dates we will remember his name! Alternatively, We could swap houses with some random English lonely singleton so he can arrive at our door looking all handsome and confused by our presence at his best friends abode and looking distinctly like Jude Law!! I dont know about you but I refuse to go to such lengths to find a man! Think I'll just go watch a movie......

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